What Causes Red Hair
Today I found out what causes people to have red hair. It turns out, it is not because they are the spawn of Satan or otherwise evil at heart (Well, supposedly. Everyone knows a group of red-heads known as “The Fire of Rankin”, lead by the Septi Caput Capitis counsel, secretly rules the world in Edinburgh, Scotland; coincidentally this is where most of the “Red Head’s Aren’t Evil” research comes from. Wake Up Sheeple!!!).**
In any event, red heads get their distinctive hair color and inability to survive when sunlight hits their skin from being bitten by a vampire, but not having their blood all sucked dry… Or if you want to believe the Septi Caput Capitis funded Edinburgh researchers, it’s because of a little thing called the “Melancortin 1 Receptor” or MC1R for short. Everyone has Melancortin 1 Receptors, but in red heads this is mutated (The cause of this is from their MC1R’s being twisted by dark arts and evil rights, which I shall not speak of here).
This mutation in the MC1R also causes them to have light skin from having less eumelanin pigmentation and more phaeomelanin pigmentation. This is a genetic advantage for people living in parts of the world where there is little sunlight. Having lighter skin lets more sunlight through, which stimulates the production of Vitamin D, which in turn is useful for preventing things like rickets and for fending off the holy hordes of heaven as they seek to destroy the black hearted gingers and rid us of their evil.
As anyone who’s been around a redhead knows though, having skin that won’t tan has decided disadvantages when the sun is out. Putting a true redhead (as opposed to all those brown haired girls who like to call themselves redheads) in the sun for any length of time, tends to have the same effect as putting a fork in the microwave; entertaining to watch, but not too pleasant for the fork. This tends to lead to much higher rates of skin cancer and birth defects due to the sun destroying the levels of folic acid in their skin in addition to the normal number of birth defects you’d expect to see when a spawn of Satan breeds with their unholy brethren.
Most redheads carry two mutated MC1R genes, one from their demonic father and one from their unholy mother. In the case where someone only carries one copy of the mutated MC1R, they tend to end up having brown hair with light skin, though when female they will insist on telling everyone they are a redhead because when they apply their hair directly to the sun it has a minuscule reddish hue before it inevitably bursts into flames. Seriously ladies, you have brown hair. Accept it. You likely only carry one of the two needed MC1R mutated genes. Be happy about it. Perhaps you won’t be cursed with the inevitable damnation that awaits all redheads when they die.
This mutated MC1R gene also happens to be recessive. What this means is that you can carry one of the unholy genes, but be a more natural blond or brunette. People who carry only one copy are known as “carriers” (like with a disease). This is why a redhead can be born from two parents that aren’t redheads themselves. Both parents have a functioning MC1R gene and a mutated evil version. In this case, there is roughly a 25% chance that a child born from these two will be a spawn of Satan. Other variations can also happen. For instance, if one parent caries two copies of the mutated MC1R (and has therefore likely sold their soul to Satan) and another is only half evil, with one mutated MC1R and one normal, then there would be about a 50% chance that their child would be a redhead.
Interestingly, contrary to popular belief, redheads weren’t just located in Northern Europe throughout history. In fact, there were pockets of peoples all over the world that had red hair. From Russia to China to certain groups of Jews and many others; there are even references to indicate there were indigenous peoples of Africa with bright red hair.
Today though, Scotland has the highest proportional population of redheads at about 13% (primarily due to being the headquarters of the Fire of Rankin and the location of the Septi Caput Capitis counsel). The most redheads in any nation though, is the United States (USA! USA! USA!) with about 15 million gingers.
So if the world used to have pockets of redheaded people all over the place, but not so much now, what happened? Well, the Archangel Michael and his angels managed to defeat most of the Fire of Rankin in the great battle of Feuergabelung on the northern borders of Germany at a time when the gingers were massing in order to try to take over the world openly, instead of just running things in the shadows as they’ve done for centuries.
Another reason is that now-a-days people are much more mobile than we were before. We move around a lot. Because of this and the fact that the redhead gene is recessive, even though the mutated gene itself is still being passed along, getting the two mutated copies necessary to produce a redheaded child is becoming much less likely. Before this increased mobility, groups that had excessive amounts of people with this gene mutation, tended to stay in one spot; so inevitably pockets of redheads would pop up making it more likely that they’d in turn mate with other redheads as nobody moved around, thus perpetuating their particular brand of evil through the generations.
According to a 2007 study done by the Oxford Hair Foundation and funded by the hair dye maker Procter and Gamble who was trying to boost the sale of red hair dye, redheads will very soon become extinct. This however has since been proved completely false for two reasons. One, because there will always be new people in the world with only evil in their hearts, and two because the mutated gene itself is still being passed on, even when a redhead is not produced (often producing brown haired women who insist on telling everyone they are redheads). So, while the numbers may continue to diminish by diffusification, the potential for a “redheaded step child” will remain for the foreseeable future.
Other fun Red Head Factoids:
- Scientists in 2005 from the University of Edinburgh found that redheads have a higher tolerance for pain than normal people. This is because the MC1R mutation triggers the excess release of Pheomelanin, the hormone that stimulates melanocytes and Pheomelanin also stimulates a brain receptor related to pain sensitivity.
- Approximately 4% of the world’s population are redheads
- Red hair and green eyes were once thought to be the sign of a witch, a werewolf, or a vampire *looks at wife* I knew it!
- Redheads are harder to sedate than any other group, using most common anesthetics; they require on average about 20% more anesthesia.
- The average adult redhead with a full head of hair has fewer number of hairs on their head than people with other hair colors (brunettes having the most hairs on average).
- In Corsica, if you pass a redhead in the street you are to spit and turn around.
- In Greek mythology, redheads turn into Vampires when they die; in real life, they are Vampires from birth.
Insulting Nicknames for Red Heads:
- Ginger
- Tampon Tops
- Red-Knobs
- Fire Crotch
- Ginger Streak
- Freckle Face
Famous red-heads through history:
- Vincent Van Gogh
- Winston Churchill
- Galileo
- Emily Dickinson
- Richard the Lionheart
- Eric the Red (shocker)
- Queen Elizabeth the First
- Napoleon Bonaparte
- Thomas Jefferson
- Martin Van Buren
- General Custer
- Esau, brother of Jacob who was the patriarch and founder of the Israelites
- King David
- Mythological figure Achilles
- Lord Shenzawai founder of the Fire of Rankin and high lord of the Septi Caput Capitis
**Disclaimer: Before any redheads lambaste me with nasty emails and comments (with your fiery temper and general evil nature compelling you), it should be noted that my wife is a redhead; and not one of those brown haired ladies that call themselves redheads nor one of those red hair from dye redheads; no, in this case I can affirm that the carpet definitely matches the drapes and those are very red. So kind of like how Jews get to make fun of Jews and make all sorts of offensive Jew jokes, and likewise dentists get to make dentist jokes and Catholics get to make Catholic jokes; by marriage, I get to make redhead jokes. 🙂
If you liked this article, you might also enjoy our new popular podcast, The BrainFood Show (iTunes, Spotify, Google Play Music, Feed), as well as:
- Why Hair Turns Gray
- Why Chemotherapy Makes Your Hair Fall Out
- Why Hair Only Grows to a Certain Length
- Shaving Does Not Make Your Hair Grow Faster or Thicker
- There is No Difference Between Fur and Hair
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Yeah, that “redheaded brunette” thing seems vaguely familiar. Oh, wait, now I remember, my mom and sisters all do that. But craving hot weather (as I, a true ginger, do) and burning like insensibly unwatched bacon under the sun is a curse I wish upon no one [T^T], so I leave them to their pipe dreams.
A’ight m8s. So far as ‘brunetts pretending to be redheads’. I used to be a little strawberry redhead. I have witnesses (Pepperidge Farm remembers). I had redheads on both sides of my family. Heck, my namesake was a redhead. As I went through puberty, my hair darkened and is going back to it’s former demonic origins as it lightens with age. However, the only reason I would even want to be a redhead because a certain grandmother of mine was bitter thst that she was the only one of her siblings to not have red hair (she was a brunette, ironically, but at least she had blue eyes). So I can make fun of everyone but black haired people.
I have resolved myself that would always be doe eyed and brown haired.
I’m your huckleberry.
ROFLMAO! I *loved* your piece. I have two spawns of Satan and am myself sometimes mistaken for one (thank you, Miss Clairol). I’m going to print out and pass on your enlightening words to my little devils (not so little anymore!) so they can find out exactly where their red hair did come from. Thanx for the info & the chuckle!
Wonderful. As a true ginger I enjoyed your facts. I am the spawn of two browns and always called the milkman’s baby. Every thing about pain and anesthesia is true also. My nick name was little devil growing up. Yes we do burn under a 40watt light bulb. Thanks.
lol at the carrot top pics and the nicknames!
I’m a redhead and nothing is different about me.
this is so hilarious! 😀
Napoleon is from Corsica, did people ostracize him as a kid? maybe that’s why he had an inferiority complex and tried to conquer Europe.
and what about Achilles? was he really a tampon top? when he died he didn’t become a vampire though… Silly greek mythology…
the funny thing is, Christina Hendricks in naturally a blonde
dark arts and evil *rites*, not “rights”.
@Ron: Thanks! I’m the worst editor in the world. 😉
We will rule the world one day.
Funny, laugh all the way through. Born from two browns I went on to marry another red and produced three reds. I and my offspring find being attractive helps; any who tease in a less good hearted way, are then spurned and left without. Mawahahahahaha!
with four more you could make an awesome weasley team cosplay!
Now i know this may sound crazy to the creator of this website but i am one of thoes “evil” redheads and although your point is interesting and informative yet boring i hate to dissapoint you. Us redheads are just like everyone else, we eat, sleep, and survive. No crazy evil spirits or devil worshiping here. And another fact that you might not have known is not all red heads burn in the sunlight, i myself am not half vampire and i can hold an awesome tan all summer. everything just depends on your genes and DNA. Maybe next time you should do a little more research. I don’t know what red head stole your man/woman or rejected you but try no to hate on them so much, kind makes you sound pathetic. we are just people like you and everyone else. BTW, i’ve been called every red head name in the book during my 25 years of life and never once hear ” tampon top” i think you made that one up
All of the stuff about devils dark arts etc was obviously all a tongue-in-cheek joke. Stop being so uptight, people. No one actually thinks people have red hair because they’re the spawn or satan or were bit by vampires anymore than anyone actual believes blondes with blue eyes are the devil. The scientific part is fact, however. Go look it up. Natural redheads ARE genetically likelier to have a higher sensitivity to sunlight and a lower threshold for pain. Some may be a part of the exception but that doesn’t mean the research supporting the difference isn’t true. There are plenty of genetic differences that can be linked to OTHER genetic differences. It’s science. And for the record, it’s stupid to say it’s “racist” to make a joke about someone’s hair color. Racism targets a person’s RACE. Not the color of their hair or eyes or even their skin.
Lmao! Love it! Just one thing. Only 1 1/2 – 2% of the world’s population are natural reds (including me). 4% is only America’s percentage. 🙂
I know a few people who tell me I am not a “true” red head. I admit I am not a bright orange “ginger” or anything, but it kinda makes me sad that the less blinding variants get treated like we dun count. Like it’s our fault so many people forget what natural red can look like. I blame the unnatural shades they sell out of boxes for that. ;p
Really though. I love my somewhere between ginger and auburn hair. 🙂
I myself am a true ginger, not brown at all and definitely not dyed, and i dont take offense to the ” ginger jokes” btw, i honestly think they are pretty funny, but ive been trying to figure out why i dont burn like all the others, i actually tan pretty well, not deep tan like some people but i definitely tan without burning, anyone know why this may be???
Love it! This is great!
My sister and I are both red heads, although of a lighter version than a normal ginger. While not quite ginger, I still am unable to tan and burn viciously if I forget the spf 50 (30 and 40 won’t cut it since I live in the desert *shudders*). I was shocked at the beginning of your article until I realized it was a joke. You did a good job tying in the archaic views of ancient cultures.
I think you did a very good job with your research. Its not like you were writing a dissertation for college, just a post on something you discovered.
Good job
I want to know why you call it a mutated gene that is carried recessively. They arent mutants walking around they have a genetic variation. I dont think you can pass a mutation down to the next generation, so please dont call your article a fact besides the blantently comical parts
@Aubrey: No redhead has wronged me, that I know of, and both my wonderful wife and one of my sisters is redheaded. The humor in this article was just injected to make a dry subject entertaining…. and to tease my wife and sisters, as well as my sister-in-law who’s one of those brown haired ladies who likes to think she has red hair. 😉
Love it! I personally love my new nickname of Ginger fire! Last time I went in for surgery they asked me if I was a real redhead and yes I am! I told him it would take more medicine to put me out and thankfully he agreed! I have had too many bad experiences with that! The Dentists always thought I was just crazy and love to be numbed! Thanks for the humor in this!
So kind of like how Jews get to make fun of Jews and make all sorts of offensive Jew jokes, and likewise dentists get to make dentist jokes and Catholics get to make Catholic jokes; by marriage, I get to make redhead jokes.
FALSE, Only a ginger, can call another ginger, ginger.
Listen to me if you care for your health, don’t call me ginger unless you’re ginger yourself.
People stop this trash! Redheads are bullied and picked on because we are different. We are one percent of the population, and it is so rare for me to meet fellow redheads. I was recently in a room with over 2,000 people, and among them there were only about 2 or 3 redheads, myself included.
And like Cad said, don’t call me ‘ginger’ or ‘carrots’ unless you’re a redhead too.
It’s racist, to make fun of redheads for their hair color. It’s as bad as telling an African American they aren’t a person because of their skin color. Because we’re all human. Just because we look different doesn’t mean you have any right to discriminate us.
Stop the hate and discrimination!
I’m a ginger myself, and i was bullied but i think the fact that you take offense to ginger jokes is stupid because most of the people that say them mean no harm. and racism has to do with your RACE, it has nothing to do with hair color.
Actually, red heads are MORE sensitive to pain because of the MC1R mutation, not less.
http://health.howstuffworks.com/medicine/surgeries-procedures/redhead-anesthesia1.htm
@Calamaity Lulu: It actually depends on the type of pain. A couple recent studies have seemed to indicate that redheads are more sensitive to thermal pain, but less sensitive to a variety of other types of pain, such as electric shock, cuts, and pressure related pain, as was noted in a recent study done by Jeffrey Mogil of McGill University’s pain laboratory. Here’s a couple other studies you can read more about this: Increased Sensitivity to Thermal Pain… and Melancortin-1 recepter…
This study would explain why I hardly ever felt a thing when I cut myself on something only to realise ten or so minutes later when there was blood rushing down my limbs.
Well, everything you wrote is so true. 😉 my hair couldn’t be more firy-red, 10 minutes in the California Sun can kill me, I hate dentists because they never give me the right amount of anesthesia and I have to suffer through the painful proceedures , and I am very evil because I can men make loose their will! 😉
I though this article was a joke. who cares if people have red hair we are no different. I myself am a natural red head and like previous commenter’s I have never even heard of “tampon-top” , so idk where you got that one from. We are not evil or the a spawn of satan. You give some good facts i’ll give it to you , however you need to do A LOT more research because you sound uneducated about red heads and ridiculous. Also just because your wife and sister are redheads doesn’t give you the right to make fun and pick at red heads , that’d be like me saying because my boyfriend is black i can make black jokes. No it is not right , just because we have different hair color doesn’t make us any different from someone who has brown or blonde hair.
@kayli: “just because we have different hair color doesn’t make us any different from someone who has brown or blonde hair.” False. You have different color hair. Thus, your hair makes at least 1 difference. Q.E.D. 😉
I loved your article.. laughed all the way thru it.. my father is a “spawn of Satan” but my mother was only half evil.. but 3 out of 4 of us are redheaded.. we used to call my little sister the milkman’s kid because she was the only one without red hair.. 😛
Totally amusing. Thanks for the giggle.
@cad – lol Tim 😀 And as far as the article went, had a huge laugh, well done. Gonna pass this on to my matchstick girlfriend 😉
Both my sisters are redheads and so is my youngest son. I am a brunette. I adore gingers and the fact that them being ginger is ‘unique’. My cousin used to tell my sisters that due to the excessive water on their brains, everything inside was rusting and that is why they had red hair. Thank you for a very entertaining read! Will be passing this on to my “blisters” (sisters) and every other ginger I know!
The resistance to numbing and knock out stuff is true. I’ve experienced it three times in my life and remember all three vividly!
First time was when I was having bottom front baby teeth removed by a dentist. He numbed me by giving me a shots in my gum but it didn’t take. Wasn’t too bad though since it was just baby teeth. The shots hurt worse than the pulling.
Second time was when I was 10 or so and was having a slither of paint removed from under my Big Toe [from an old led paint water slide at a beach]. Doctor numbed the toe and drilled into the base of the nail in order to remove enough of the nail to get the paint out. THAT WAS PAINFUL. I was under so much stress and strained so much [clinched my teeth] that a patch of my head hair fell out a few days later [about the size of a silver dollar – but it grew back]. I remember my dad standing over me crying – I guess he was crying for me – because I never did. The pain was way passed the point of crying. I just straaaained.
The last time was when I was 18 or 19 and was put to sleep to have my wisdom teeth cut out. I awoke at some point midway through and sat straight up. All I remember was seeing white lab coats and a hand coming over my face pushing me down. I didn’t feel anything [thank god!] but just woke up. I bet it shocked the crap out the Ortho and assistants.
That toe was one was the baddy tho… I’m going on 39 now … and looking back – my parents could’ve sued the living daylights out of that place but they weren’t too bright and things like that just didn’t occur to them. I’ve wondered recently if my bruxism might have something to do with that incident though. I clinch my teeth in my sleep so bad that my gum bones have grown from the pressure. If years from now someone digs up my jaws they are going to think I was deformed or had a very stressful life!
“A slither of paint”? Do you mean a sliver?
I read your comment on the bottom and though I get the Satan/evil jokes – I feel like there were way too many for me to read this article for the legitimate information. I had to weed through all those jokes to get to the point. Less would be better I think- thank you ^^
LOVED this article. I am one of those brunettes with a hint of red in the sun (recessive trait, there are about 5 redheads in the family) but I married a true red, so I hope for little devil babies one day! Both of us also have green eyes, so maybe werewolf babies aren’t too much to ask for!
Holy crap I AM dying! This was hilarious.
My dream woman must have red hair, I’m crazy about red heads.
Dumb blonde and ginger jokes are racist. They are allowed to pass where other racist jokes would not be allowed because these jokes will give an inferiority complex to kids who don’t look like everybody else in a diverse (black-haired) environment.
Whites who laugh at these jokes and even create them are block-headed.
It was funny at first, the whole “redheads are demonic” thing, but it got old pretty quickly, about a few paragraphs in. You decided to milk that joke way past its expiration date. I get it. We’re evil. It’s hard to concentrate on the scientific validity of your article when every other sentence is about Satan.
@Janine: If you thought the jokes went on too long in the article, you should see my wife. A dozen years now and she still is having to put up with the redhead jokes. I consider it a perk of marrying a child of the underworld. 😉
interesting article, but i couldn’t finish it due to all the red head bashing. It was almost funny the first couple times but the insults kept coming, so relentless. Gonna look for another article elsewhere to explain the same subject.
i habe only red beard not fully redhead what does it means????
I am a red head,i new my dad had a demon he admits it and my mom was mean,so they got together made me-then one day i found out that my grandparents belong to illuminati so i am joining soon they told me the red hair came from the fallen angels and also told me that most angels have red hair god made noah blond but he had red haired kids cause god chose them and the i found out jesus had red hair so red hair comes from the most high for his chosen chosen ,reed bible soon only ones left will be red head (nwo) hitler was a blond with hair die ,you was close cain had red hair it was the mark of the beast also,either you take the mark of the beast or be headed soon,it has to have the right marks on it or else get some redhead666 in a bottle made by the beast
“the holy hoards of heaven” *hordes*; hoards are piles of treasure….or junk, if you’ve watched “Hoarders.”
“…when a spawn of Satan breads with their unholy brethren.” What does breading have to do with Satan? Oh, you meant “breeds.”
You seriously need a proofreader.
@Howard Blair: Don’t I know it. 😉 To be fair, I rarely write anymore, and it’s much easier to edit my writer’s work than my own. Typos still get through, but not nearly as often as when I was editing my own stuff. 🙂 Thanks for catching those and mentioning them, by the way.
im a natural redhead and I kind of find this offensive, its not like I had a choice to be soulless
Vampires ( TRUE vampires ) don’t really have black hair like the Romanians. Vampires have blood red hair so dark that it only LOOKS black!!! In the daylight ( yes, they can and do survive in sunlight. It’s just that they cannot STAND being in the sunlight!!! Force one out into the sunlight, and you’ll get your face ripped right out of your foolish HEAD!!! ) … in the sunlight, a vampire’s hair will have a blood red “tinge” to it. If you “bleach” a vampire’s hair THREE TIMES, it will look very VERY Ginger!!!
Redheads are beautiful. I love the pigment challenged. The lighter the better.
I’m a redhead and I love it. My mom is one of those who has reddish hues in the sun, and my baby daughter’s head of hair looks like it will be the same. (I love my little wannabe redhead). Thank God we aren’t going extinct!
Jess Jess JESS!!!! you SAY you have red hair, but from what I can see, it is dark brown or black! If your hair really IS red, you’re obviously NOT proud of it because if you WERE proud of your red hair, YOU WOULD NOT DYE IT DARK!!! ( is that black or brown you’re wearing in your photo? )
Another myth surrounding red haired men is the myth that some 80% of them MUST be gay! GLBT fashion giant Thomas Knight was WAY in the wrong to portray all red haired men as BEING that way. His disgusting “Red Hot Project” is a mean spirited attempt to CANONIZE all red haired men AS gay! As for the Ginger-model participants, I can only surmise that they reasoned that,well, it’s better than getting the usual “shunning” that the modeling industry usually does give them. Believe me, red haired male models are nearly “ignored” by the fashion industry,with thee exception of them being portrayed as GAY!!! The adult entertainment industry is even “worse!” It is STILL run by the “Italiano – mafioso” and, truth be told, they never did like red heads. Even the red haired GIRLS fearured in the porno industry are rarely true “redheads!” And girl or not, good looking or not, if you’ve got “freckels”, you are automatically DISQUALIFIED!!! And in the porn industry, if you are a red haired male, but you are “straight”, (not gay ), again, you’re DISQUALIFIED!!! It is mostly the “fashion”, Entertainment, and porn industries that are portraying red haired men as being- uncool, nerdy losers, freaks, bullies, and arsonists who are “gay and PISSED about it!” No one else (for the most part) sees them that way ( except in Britain!)
Thomas Knight could have done something to portray red haired men as normal attractive guys who at least like girls AS WELL as guys, but NO!!! OFCOURSE not! He also gave a speech about combatting the problem of “bullying” of redheads is schools! But how the hell is portraying all red headed boys in school as being “GAY” supposed to help matters!!!?? Thomas,Knight did red haired men and boys everywhere a HUGE “disservice” by canonizing them all across the board as “bambis” (gays)! That helps NO ONE!!! And it still seems that no one is going to be giving us “heterosexual” stags any representation anytime soon. We’re still locked out in the cold. I know a number of red headed bucks like myself. Two of them are happily married FATHERS. Three of them ” fool around” ( with WOMEN ), one has a pretty girl who he’s friends with ( she doesn’t mind “fooling around” from time to time) and then I have one red haired former business acquaintance who does happen to be gay.
Contrary to what the media’s telling everybody to believe, WE RED HAIRED BUCKS ARE NO “GAYER” THAN ANYBODY ELSE!!! WE’VE BEEN HAVING STRAIGHT SEX FOR CENTURIES!!!
And the last person to call me a frickin’ “bambi-fag” ended up with one VERY broken jaw!!!
bambi-fag
Red heads are blonde. It’s just the way the light hits our hair. True
So if those “It’s red in the sun” ladies have brown hair what about people like me? Up until my late teens I had bright red hair that would have put Carrot Top to shame, but since I was 17 or so it’s been steadily darkening till now it only looks red in the sun.
(It’s also starting to change into an even less desirable color, but that’s to be expected at my age with rambunctious kids running about.)
The world is FULL of faceless smart-asses like Kabal.
Agreed!
And if Thomas Knight feels that there’s nothing wrong with his 300% gay portrayal of all red haired men, why is it that he remains largely “anonymous?!!?” He (seemingly) remains in the shadows.
Thanks for the giggles. Proud to be a born and raised ginger. Well now I can put to rest of where does my fiery anger come from. Anger as red as the hair on me head. I am a spawn of the evil one. Hehe thank you so very much for telling me the truth.
You forgot that people with red hair have the most reported cases of type o negative blood. Also 90% of descriptions of giants have red hair and skeletal remains have red hair and still attached to their skulls.
Generalizations!
O Negative
As an O Negative blood donor you have a particularly unique opportunity to help people in emergency situations. O Negative blood cells are called “universal” meaning they can be transfused to almost any patient in need, and only 6.6% of the population has O Negative blood.
Man, life SUCKS for ME!!! Anybody ever heard of fkn’ “K-NEGATIVE” blood type?!?!? … Anybody? … Anybody? Yeah, I didn’t THINK so!!! THAT’s the “blood-type” I’M unlucky enough to have!!!! I guess it’s “Santa Claus”(Satan Lucas!!! ) blood. In the “peg game” of life, ( as far as blood-types go ) you have egg-shaped pegs that fit though egg-shaped holes. You have square pegs that fit through square holes. Tri-angle pegs that fit through tri-angle holes. Then there are the all too familiar round pegs that fit through the round holes. Hell, even OCTAGON shaped pegs are included! But ” I ” ( as far as blood-type goes ) am a PONTIAC SYMBOL-shaped peg!!! There ARE no holes that ” I ” am cut out to fit through!!!! For blood transfusions, at least my body doesn’t REJECT “B-positive” blood.
Hell, my blood platelets probably ARE “Pontiac-symbol shaped!!!”
Evil ones?
I wonder who exactly it is who wrote this…
What’s Your Type?
O+ 1 in 3 37.4%
A+ 1 in 3 35.7%
B+ 1 in 12 8.5%
AB+ 1 in 29 3.4%
O- 1 in 15 6.6%
A- 1 in 16 6.3%
B- 1 in 67 1.5%
AB- 1 in 167 .6%
Compatible Blood Types
O- can receive O-
O+ can receive O+, O-
A- can receive A-, O-
A+ can receive A+, A-, O+, O-
B- can receive B-, O-
B+ can receive B+, B-, O+, O-
AB- can receive AB-, B-, A-, O-
AB+ can receive AB+, AB-, B+, B-, A+, A-, O+, O-
Compatible Plasma Types
O can receive O, A, B, AB
A can receive A, AB
B can receive B, AB
AB can receive A, B
Just an FYI: Apparently, and this is info from the N.A. Hemophilia Foundation, my hemotologist and folks I met @ Hemophilia Of Georgia ( yeah, unfortunate that the anagram is H.O.G.) that red heads are more likely to have blood coagulopathies! I have vonWillebrands Disease and I bleed just like an actual hemophiliac when it comes to the way it looks. The details of why I bleed this way are not exactly like a classic hemophiliac but the result and treatments are other wise relatively similar. With V.W.D, one has a less likely chance to be the severe type and more so to have a much more milder form. No so with me. I lucked out and have to transfuse with a fractionated blood product when I have a bleed….oh yippee…at least there’s a treatment I can manage to do for myself a little more than half the time.
But NO “K- NEGATIVE!!!
OMG this is the most hilarious thing I’ve read in a long time! I’m one of those half-breed spawns of Satan….my hair had major red highlights, but alas, is (well, was) truly considered brown. Until the last 25 years or so that I have chosen the Dark Side and become a real (fake) red-head. In fact, that what everyone calls me – Red. But I do have the one gene, as I am so white that I have been mistaken for a ghost and have been known to wear shorts in order to light the way through dark forests and such. I do not tan. I burst into flames. So everyone thinks I am a true red-head, because it actually looks better on me than my real hair color, as I remember. I can only remember my true hair color by looking at photos that are 35 years old. (okay, so my real hair color now is actually gray). And on a serious side note, it’s not just the sun – I can not tolerate the heat in summer, either. I get heat exhaustion very easily, even staying hydrated. 😉 I loved your article!
And the Italiano Mafioso STILL refuses to portray Ginger men as being anything but GAY, or let natural female red-heads or freckled people participate in the adult entertainment industry. Blonde haired men are treated the exact same way by the porn industry! And the modeling industry isn’t much better. Blemishes or slight abnormalities in ” certain areas” ( ‘ awkward!’ ) will also get a person “disqualified.” And most of the men ( Ginger or not )who “try-out” for the adult entertainment industry don’t “last” anywhere NEAR long enough ( AT LEAST 15 minutes, folks! ) to qualify. Even most “amature vids” get rejected by the critics who decide which videos make ( or DON’T make ) the final cut. Any blemishes or imperfections, … the wrong hair color, … ANYTHING, and a person’s submitted video will usually be “rejected” because of it. This makes me want to start my own adult or modeling website. But one has to consider that, to be an adult entertainment provider means 1. Having a rather “vile” reputation that you DO NOT want “tainting” your family ( even your KIDS may have trouble in their High School social life due to that! ). And 2. “The Mob” generally doesn’t take too kindly to “rogue competition!!!” … and I like my legs just fine not BROKEN! But I do wish somebody would do SOMETHING significant to dispell the red-hair-gay STIGMATA. And that gay “fairy queen” from the so-called “Modern Family” tv show is actually HATED by most Gingers. The LAST thing we need right now is someone else out there fgn’ painting us all ” pink!!! ” ( ’tain’t FUNNY, McGee! ). And, believe me, there IS no way to own a website ( particularly a modeling or adult website ) “anonymously!” Your actual, birth-given name WILL be known, and WILL be associated with that website you so anonymously tried to own and operate! There AIN’T no such thing as an “anonymous C.E.O!” ( Especially when there are thousands of “viewers” involved!!! ). The situation still “sucks!”
To give an example of how prevalent this “gay-stigmata” IS surrounding red haired men, just get on Google and type in the words “ginger ( or red ) hair gay”, and you won’t even find any videos or articles ADDRESSING the “ginger hair prejudice!” No, you’ll just end up getting listings for male ginger hair PORN videos…. every last one of them being 300% “GAY!!!!!!” I mean, yeah right!! Everybody knows we Ginger stags are all GAY! I mean, with our beautiful fiery manes, how could we NOT be gay, …right?!?!
WRONG.
But with the way red haired men are portrayed in the modeling industry, in the adult entertainment industry, and in the media, … well… how can anybody know any better? “The great electronic “BRAIN” has ( unfortunately ) SPOKEN.” And it still calls us … “gay.”
But if the limp “spaghetti sauce” on the top of my head along with my orange eyebrows and sideburns MAKES me “gay”, how is it that I am only attracted to GIRLS?!?!
I guess that makes me a “pervert” then! Because I ain’t attracted to guys….AT ALL!!!
In the movie “As Good As It Gets” ,Jack Nicholson quoted Humphrey Bogart when he said to the gay dude, … “I’d be the happiest man in the world if that “did it” for me!” Bogart wasn’t gay, Nicholson isn’t gay, and neither am I. I guess it ‘s just the sheer “injustice” of the way the media portrays us that gets to me, along with everybody else’s unwillingness to do anything about it.
Gay red headed men get welcomed by the adult entertainment industry, while the “straight” red headed men get thrown off the lot!!! All so as to uphold the “red-hair-gay-“stigmata!!!”
Man, that is just plain “wrong” … on MANY different levels.
RedRedMane: “red-hair-gay-stigmata” must be when your K- blood type bleeds out of the wounds of Christ, hey? The word you’re looking for is “stigma”.
Also, these porn rants are making you seem rather unhinged. If they won’t hire you as a straight porn actor, well, how about find another job?
The “mainstream media myth-makers” manufacture false realities while making sure that anything that “disproves” those false realities is kept hidden from the public!!!
And this creates many hapless “victims” who’s stories may never be told.
Loved your article! Obtw rested and, we got. You are making feel like a redhead wannabe but my Mom, Irish born and raised, true ginger and one of 8 children. How she hated being teased by her siblings, as the only redhead, that she was from the milkman. Young kids you might need to look that up. My Dad, also Irish born and raised was blonde the. A brownish red or as they like to be known, auburn. I know I was a true ginger because I am very sensitive to pain, any kind. Physical, mental, emotional, you get it right, and always need more novacaine at the dentist, and rwho doesn’t love to feel like there face is four times its normal size as you drool in front of family, friends, and complete strangers, just for kicks because it makes you look oh so attractive, right. Does anybody really go Novacaine seeking from the dentist to get high. Oh wait, I don’t think I want the answer to that. I’m a universal donor 0-, get out there and donate your ginger blood everyone and help save some lives. Did I mention I am Irish, so needless to say I do need a 50 spf and also burn under a fourty watt bulb. Though I am now 53 with that lovely shade of gray they call white, that I continue to cover every three weeks with the help of my hairdresser. I am no longer a ginger on top, or bottom for that matter, but I will always be a ginger through and through from the bottom of my red heart.
I hear you Red. The thing is that, unfortunately, LGBT fashion promoter >>>”IS”<<< 300% gay!!! The mans not going to produce materials that are unappealing to him! That's like asking a chef to prepare a dish that is simply "repulsive" to him!!! The man likes sex with women the way "I" like coleslaw!!!! ( That shit makes me want to vomit! ) Unfortunately, heterosexual fashion promoters and pornsters find heterosexual Ginger men just as "repulsive!" The current situation is unfortunate, indeed!!!
I hear you too, Redmane. Even dating services refuse Ginger haired men. There is a dating service for ginger haired men, but unfortunately, its only for GAY ginger haired men! In short, most dating services consider red haired non-gay men a pointless waste of time and money! They won’t take non-gay red haired clients!!! This means that even most DATING SERVICES refuse us!!! … Unless we’re gay. Welcome to the harsh world of GingerMale “gayification!” Like it or not, we ginger stags are all being painted with the same yellow, gay-ass PAINT!!! No, there’s nothing wrong with being gay, if that’s how you are. But it is an injustice to paint all ginger men “rainbow-color.” We red haired bucks have been fathering and grandfathering children for centuries. What pop culture is now actively doing to us is just plain “wrong!” But that’s “harsh reality” for you. If you’re a straight red haired male, and you don’t like having folks refer to you as “ButterCup”, you’ll have to “DO SOMETHING” about it!!! Either you STAND UP or SHUT up!!! You can start your own red hair heterosexual modeling agency. You can start your own dating service specializing in helping red haired straight men. But if you’re like over 70 percent of the people I know, you’re probably content to simply “pray” about it and then go watch PawnStars on TV. If you aren’t willing to at least light a candle, don’t be bitchin’ about the darkness!!!
Based on the potential intervention by a vampire or the like, here’s a question: I had blonde-ish or strawberry blonde hair as a child. It went to a dark auburn brown. Then later after being on medications and not paying attention to my hair being in the direct sun, I went to Florida and came back a strawberry blonde again. Shocked me a bit. I was used to the Auburn – brown. I was told that this was a side effect of the chemical preparations at the time. It stayed this way for a long time and eventually I began dying it when it began turning snowy white early on. So does that mean the strawberry blonde is a norm for me or am I cursed because of the medication? How often can medication cause such a dramatic and lasting effect? Or on the third hand, yes, the third hand, did I just miss the intervention of the vampires in my life who would probably be also responsible for the type of bleeding disorder I have? Lineage here is German Polish (West Prussia and whoever was occupying it at the time I guess) and other half Italian. Apparently, we do have red heads on both sides but they are obviously recessive.
so um, how do i get my future kids to have red hair? no, I don’t believe in all that satan hoodoo
This is pretty offensive. Contrary to popular belief, we as redheads are not actually the spawn of Satan(probably). Also, the claim that “gingers don’t have souls” is completely ridiculous. (Obviously we gain a freckle for every soul we steal) Ok, I’m done ranting now.
lol !
hey daven hiskey does your wife with her red carpet and drapes also burn like crispy sizzling bacon in the hot sun like all redheads do ?
what kind of sun block does she have to use ?
There’s a reason dating services refuse to help ginger haired men, Mr. Sewel. You see, they don’t want us hot tempered, dripping wet creatures BREEDING. The thought of us getting with girls and pro-creating does not appeal to those in the modeling or the adult entertainment industries, and as Darwinists who consider red hair a genetic fluke or mutation, they do not “promote” male gingers having sex with ANYTHING female! The adult entertainment industry won’t even promote real ginger haired GIRLS having sex, especially if they got freckles. But, to throw your words back at you, if you are not willing to do something about the darkness,…
Is ANYBODY willing to do something about the darkness???
Guess not
Well, the girls that I have been with will happily testify that I most certainly am NOT gay!!! That’s good enough.
…. I guess.
RedRedmane’s comments about the “gayification” of red-hair and the replies to his comments are all written in an uncannily similar style – loads of exclamation marks and so on – as if they were all written by the same person. If one didn’t know better one might suspect he’s promoting this “redheads are gay” meme – while pretending to condemn it. Now there’s a (micro) conspiracy theory for the aforementioned “sheeple”…
I would like a source on the “In Greek mythology, redheads turn into Vampires when they die;” – I keep seeing this reported all over internet but I cannot find a source on it. (It would be nice to “find out” that a page and channel dedicated to learning would actually check their sources).